Friday, February 28, 2014

FEBRUARY'S FAMILY TRADITIONS + 1 MONTH

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 28, 2014




Welcome back to another segment
of
 "So you think you can:
come back once a month, 
 be all tired, 
eat, sleep, shower, change sporadically, 
consequently, JUST post updates, 
because REDO's are non-existent,
talk about babies since you had one or something
and
act like those little beings take up lots of time?"

Sorry,
it's kind of the norm around here
and most likely for a bit more.

If you're willing, bare with me, 
I'll eventually find my baby "footing"
and go beyond family updates.

I promise, I HAVE been working on other things,
very slowly,
but still, when time has allowed. 

I actually did a cool FRIEND FIX back in December, 
if you can believe it, 
But never got to share. 

Ohhh well.


For now,
 sit back while I share a little back-story on how we celebrate monthly milestones
and
Baby M's 1st one.


It's all due to my mom,
so I dedicate this post to her.
Love you, mom.

Celebration photos at the end
My little guy at 1 month :)
To date- 8 weeks 1 day




BACKSTORY

We've had a tradition in our family
ever since my youngest sibling was little.


A day or so after coming home*Out of love & respect for my youngest sibling's privacy, 
I've hidden their image.


 My parents adopted and brought home our sibling
at about 5 days old.
(almost 27 years ago!)

What excitement my sis and I felt!
I remind myself that it's probably what my kids feel now about their little brother.

 I was 10, my sis 9, 
when our brand new baby came home.

A perfect age for being little mommies :)

It's a funny "coincidence" how some of what they're experiencing at this age
(son 10, daughter 8)
I experienced myself.

I'm blessed beyond measure to have the love and support of family & friends,
who've made this exciting and tiresome, new transition, easier.

Not the case with my mom.

She, like many women, including her own mother,
and some dads,
became a single parent.

I CAN ONLY IMAGINE
the concern, fear, doubt, uncertainty,
pain, brokenness, etc.
she felt.

'HOW Lord, HOW?'


here

I'm exhausted myself and I have help.


According to mom, my Grama B (her mom), offered to adopt the baby from her.
My grandmother had remarried, had another child in her 40's,
(my aunt J, 6 months younger)
and was willing to take on an infant, in her older age (now 50's),
for the sake of her newly single/distraught daughter.
My mom would have 1 less child to worry about;
my grama would care for baby like her own.
But my mom made it clear,
'That's MY child."
To which my grandmother responded,
'THAT'S what I wanted to hear'
'You just worry about the baby then
and I'll make sure the girls are provided for.'
God was making a way!

Anyway, back to the tradition.

I'm not sure what inspired it.


About a month after the separation.

Don't judge...this was the late eighties haha

 This wasn't the "IN" style for kids either but our aunt had done our hair. SMH
 Mom is one gorgeous lady though- about 31 years old



Maybe surrounding circumstances.
(parents separated when our baby was 2 months old)

 The need to celebrate in the midst of difficulty.
(2 kids + newborn, full time work, financial struggle, 
compensation for the void)

Making sure our baby always felt loved
or
For the pure joy of celebrating this new little life.

Maybe a combination of all.

*I'll get details from mom, then update*


Whatever the reason, 
my mom decided to celebrate baby's monthly milestones,
a monthly birthday per se;
with cake and the birthday song.

It was awesome! 

Cake/dessert,
each month,
 on the same day,
for a WHOLE year?!

Oh ya!


About a year later.
Like our perms? You TOO can look like us! ahahaha

As far as I know, this wasn't common at the time.
No pinterest, Picasa, Flikr, Instagram or the like
showing how to celebrate monthly.
There were no how-to's on staging photos 
or
social media to instantly share these exciting moments.

Nope.

We celebrated monthly until the 1st birthday
and from then on, each year like normal people.
lol
Those monthly celebrations were fun and something to look forward to.
They seemed to lighten the mood and help lessen the void a little more.

My mom always made sure we felt special one way or another.
Even when there was no money.
She'd give us certificates for being great at whatever
or just to say how awesome she thought we were.
She made sure our sibling felt just as loved.

But most importantly,
she taught us to trust the Lord.
Her mom had taught her
and her grandmother had taught her mom.
And now hubby and I pass that on to our kids.
That legacy is much greater than any monthly celebration.


here

But, I'm thankful for those seemingly simple celebrations as well,
because they really were so much more.

 I know now it was an act of faith to celebrate,
to find the joy in the jumble,
to create stability in the uncertainty,
to trust that things were becoming better,
that we weren't done growing as a family,
and
that the Lord had us in his hands the whole time!

UPDATE
Mom said it was a combo of all but mostly
the fact that she was not allowed to bless or celebrate her children before.
Nothing was going to stop her now.

 I've held on tightly to that same faith,
 relied on and lived out for our kids.
Just like mom, grama & great-grama,
 continue to show them how to trust 
and celebrate in the midst of hardship.

I may not be a single parent,
and I praise the Lord for that,
but I KNOW first hand, the difficulty & void that came with it.



here


That's why I'm so happy this ministry exists.
It provides tools, support & different events 
to help and encourage single moms.
Something that would have been a Godsend for my mom, 
had it been around back then.

Life can get hard,
Things not work out as planned or envisioned,
Come across big and small challenges,
but hopefully, 
overcome them successfully, gaining courage, confidence & character.

Where ever you are in life,
celebrate your big and small accomplishments, 
your victories over failures
and
dare to believe things will get better.
Trust that it all has purpose.

So, guess what?
I'm bringing you along as we celebrate monthly "birthdays" for a year,
take family photos with the babe of honor
and
lastly, capture his changes/growth through his own photos.


Here's to his first monthly birthday!

2.2.14
 Out to lunch after church


My sis

He's focused on the lights more than anything 
At home after lunch for cake and pictures

All the girls with baby M.


////////////////////

2.20.14


Baby M. 7 weeks old

The very same park we came to the day of the delivery.
Finally getting to come back, this time with the baby and NO pain! lol



My loves!

////////////////////

We recently celebrated my daughter's 8th birthday,
so those pics will be up, soon-ish. hahaha

No comments:

Post a Comment